Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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