Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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