Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
