I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
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