You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Randomize