It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
