Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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