sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize