I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
