Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Randomize
