i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
