He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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