its not stalking. its research.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
