I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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