I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize