it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
