got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
