dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Randomize
