He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
if i died would you start the facebook group?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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