do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
