yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
