there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
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