The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Randomize
