in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Randomize
