You're so nebulous sometimes
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Randomize
