I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
