I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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