Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I checked into jail on foursquare
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
