I'm really into asian looking animals
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
