my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
