he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
