And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
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