i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
