the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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