dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
