I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
