so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize