i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Randomize
