So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
