Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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