I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
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