dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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