Kiss
Puke
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
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