Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
