So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
my sisters under your porch take her home
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
