So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
