so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
We have started to decorate penises.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
We have so much sex to catch up on
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Drunk is not a location!
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
