it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Randomize
