your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
