I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
