it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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