Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
