Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
